Women In Distress

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Everywhere I go I'm asked if I think the university stifles writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them. There's many a best-seller that could have been prevented by a good teacher. ~ Flannery O'Connor

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[Daniel]

This is one of the principle psycho therapeutic nails on the head;
Having a dysfunctional (operative word) soft spot for women in distress.
Why? The answer of course is plain and  simple, mothers.
 
Won't do the "poor me" piss parade.
It might help others, I don't know. Commonly people share these issues collectively.

If this virus had never entered life, it would be a very different reality.
Could go into details if it would help anyone here. If not, then spare the hankie to cry in.

Its good to see the forest for the trees.
Much of the forest has been chopped down and now its a conservation movement to save whats left of it.

Carnage on the way is still bleeding, but that's just the karma of it, that's all.
It's just one of those things.
You bury the "dead" and move on.

[Jana]

Yea

• Savior Complex—Males having a dysfunctional attraction for women in distress is one of the most common themes in Borg society. Weak, dependent women use their weakness to enlist their sons in a savior complex. The negative feminine is the result of a culture of disempowerment and has to do with the general collapse of humanization in culture. It often shows as helpless women putting herself in the position of childbearer, dependent on a man for livelihood. There is usually addiction, silence, subterranean anger and the sacrifice of personal growth. For men, it is easier to screw down to the damsel in distress, than to seek out a sovereign peer. Finding peers is one of the hardest things ever considering that in this civilization most humans are broken. Some however are awake to the reasons and machinations of this and are setting about to raise themselves up. If people are not going raw, then their tissues are in distress...from dissonance at the atomic level results emotional, mental, relational and spiritual distress. We can be beset with both victim and savior complex at the same time from the neurological mirroring of our parents. Go check out Dr. Rhoda Hahn on personality disorders on Youtube.

distress: afflict, aggrieve, agonize, ail, be on one's case, bother, break, bug, burn up, depress, desolate, discombobulate, disquiet, disturb, do a number on, dog*, eat*, get to, get*, give a hard time, grieve, harass, harry, hound, hurt, injure, irk, irritate, make it tough for, miff, nag, needle, nit-pick, oppress, pain, peeve, perplex, pester, pick on, plague, push, push buttons, rack, sadden, strain, strap, stress, tick off, torment, torture, trouble, try, vex, weigh, wound

[Jane]

Daniel, I have been doing this awesome tele-course for the last few weeks....
http://www.callingintheone.com/
we all have mothers and carnage and soft spots.... and I would be happy for any details you want to share...
And maybe you would be interested in this course too.  Maybe you too Jana.... 
Hope all is well.
Jane

[Daniel]

Jane,

 I looks really good! Geared towards women it seems, at least the way it's marketed.
Don't know if that would really matter however, could be just as valuable for men.

As far as speaking on more details of what I was sharing I'm not so sure how productive that would be.
I have tried that in the past and it usually amounted to others misunderstanding what I was saying no matter how skillfully it was expressed.
This then also laid me open to attack and criticism from the very people who posed themselves as friends.
This is true for a handful people I have known in several forums.

I hope this helped open the doors of understanding, don't want to indulge in drama.

Life is too short to waste precious time on more nonsense.
I hope you understand my hesitation.

Namaste,

Dan

Note: This post has been edited and simplified on 2/22/10

[Jane]

Daniel, I think I have heard about what happened at the first gathering...and so it goes on and on, drama unfolding....
From what I have figured out myself, I have to 'take what belongs to me and leave the rest'....  I have really been enjoying Tom on IPM pod (Balder's Pod on Gaia) lately....reading about how everything EVERYTHING that rises affords him an opportunity to find out more of who HE is....and maybe who is out there too.   I was trained as a youngster to be a caregiver and caretaker, and I have spent most of my early life, ha, all but about the last decade, 'inside other people's head, helping them to do their work'.... and not only is that a thankless, largely fruitless job, it is not MY job.  It took me a long time to really get this.  My job is to be me and show up as me and to take up my own space.  This sounds sort of inane when I write it down here, but still, it is one of the most important things I have ever really had to learn.  and when I look at it now, I consider that I likely was frightened that I would not exist or be important if I was not co-dependently caretaking the world.  I have discovered this is simply not so.
The Calling in the One course does have some men, not many, on it.  My sense it is likely wonderful for anybody..... The One that we seek, first, is ourself....that is really all I have to get right, the rest follows.  .
I have a sense that you have taken on a lot in your life......
lots of love to you
Jane

[Jana]

Hi Dan,
My spiel was generic obviously not specific to you.

I don't think it healthy to meet forumites. Once you meet em, they are no good to talk to anymore. Forums should I think be kept as a virtual reality game to spout off on. Forums also are not the forum for personal relationship, the are for the exchange of ideas and jokes. Once you have these two things down, then the damsel in distress thing won't be an issue.
In order to stop being God's little helper, you need to active on the path of your own highest contribution, then those who seek to take something from you won't have a chance against the almighty fire of the muse.

As for calling in the one, I don't want someone even if I found them (expt Steve that is and since I won't find him that leaves me free.) It is a great relief not to look, want, seek however I couldn't be here without kundi. I am free of the sex wheel. Hahahahaha

[Jane]

Jana, I am respectful of your 'not wanting the One even if you found them'..... I've resonated with this sentiment for years, and really expected to stay there forever, for many, many reasons....however, I've changed my mind, and my heart.  I have a version of the healing community (similar to that which you share sometimes) in my vision.  I have worked towards actualizing this community alone...and now I don't want to do this as a solitary person any longer.  I love people. I love sharing.  And I want a partnership that is large and bright and fabulous enough to hold both me and this wonderful and important vision of community.  So, after all these years, I am giving up my directorship of the LSA (Labrador Spinster's Association) and evolving my commitment to myself and to the world.  I will report back on how this part of my journey unfolds.  My next stop is California next month to study Raw Food Nutrition with the Dina's in Fort Bragg....and I have a two month internship at the Innisfree Farm in Comox in Sept-Oct.... and in between these, I have some money-making stops planned.....  and today, well, today I am still skiing with Rosie up on the hill, and working on my Smoothie recipes for Lent...today was Raw almonds, dates, apples and oranges all blended with a bit of water.....yes, it's all GOOD! 
Love Jane

[feral]

Your trips sound really cool Jane. If you're going to be in Comox, please come over and visit us in PR. We'd love to see you.

[Jana]

I agree Jane that community can't just be talked about it has to be actualized. I find noninitate cooked fooders to be intolerably backward and unworkable...I have even withdrawn my compulsive attempts to enlighten and help...in order to focus on my true work. I figure that after this next book is out, and espec. after my visionary book is out, then I will find people on the same page and start community building. Right now my community consists of people enlisting K help via email. I have to actively repulse Boulderites from entering my life lest I throttle them, (they are mad).

I walked past my true love because I was not yet sovereign.

[Jane]

Rhonda, I will be in your neck of the woods for two months....studying herbology and working at the CSA farm there... I am so excited about it.  I am really looking forward to bringing all my new Raw Chef skills into the mix too.  I will look forward to visiting you guys.

Jana,  I have to say, I love all the foodies.... I don't really care whether they are into the raw thing or not.... I love the people who are really paying attention to 'taste', to how taste has co-evolved....and how to play with it........food is not only about being healthy, and vibrant in  molecular sense, it is also an amazing artistic adventure all on its own..... I love it!
I have also lost a 'true love' once in my life for not yet being sovereign...... oh, I have worn a hairy shirt for a decade or more at that wailing wall....and now I realize too that perhaps this loss has been the most determining pressure for me to actually find out and be who I am as a sovereign soul.... and I am very grateful for that experience.... and I am done with the hairy shirt and the wailing wall too, as it sounds like you are too. As Jean Huston is fond of saying: "The time is now, and we are the people.  I know they have said this before.  They were wrong.  This is it!" I know it is time for all of us to come together with our best feet forward, show up, and give our gifts...and as Allister McLean ended his book No Great Mystery: "We are all better when we are loved."
(and that goes for you too Daniel, just in case you think the thread has been hijacked and you have been forgotten!)
love Jane

[Jana]

I mean occluded, dense, indocrinated, 911 denying, Pleiadian fantasizing, sex obsessed, troop supporting, imperalist whores, arrogant, belligerent, contrary supercilious...ie: Borg.

But I am learning to stand up to them by speaking my truth...it makes them jump.

[Jane]

Whoooa, now Jana, tell us what you REALLY think.....
I gather you are not fond of McDonald's!
love Jane

[Jana]

Actually that was a mixture of types, you do not normally find Pleiadian fantasizing and troop supporting in the same individual unless they are unusually schizophrenic. But the underlying malady to all human silliness is ignorance.

Anyway, the moral of the story is that you cannot fight madness with madness, and you cannot fight ignorance with ignorance, or shit with shit. Life is a battle of energy. Light (life positive) and dark (life negative) are different frequencies of a spectrum of energy. Reacting negatively to negativity is counterproductive and keeps energy at the lower end of the scale…in the toilet. Acting humorously or creatively toward negativity is sovereignty building. This is the ace up the sleeve of the sovereign individual...knowing that it is pointless engaging the Borg on its own level.

The heart produces neuropeptides that travel to the brain to determine the emotional flavoring of our interpretation of reality, thus establishing our thoughts and behaviors. If we are in a state of fear we will perceive a fearful reality. If we are in a state of love we will perceive a loving reality. We become addicted to our habitual emotional cocktail in order to maintain our chosen worldview and attitude.

In order to outwit the Borg and gain freedom from our own shadow and its connection to the Matrix we can establish our own transcendent interpretation of reality by cultivating positive emotions. Some of the ways we can reprogram our brain include: smiling, upright posture, meditative arts, deep breathing, tapping, laughing, humor, sunlight, raw-greens, alternating hot and cold, exercise and outrageous service. Oh, and I almost forgot, enemas!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cD5Ms4Hxn7c  —Max Igan, Reprogramming Your Brain 1/5 http://thecrowhouse.com

[Jane]

Last night in the Calling in the One program, I was on a small group session with one woman laughing, "you know what has come home to me? I haven't got the time with the 'One' out there at the moment, I am so delighted with the 'One' I have just discovered in here."  It is true that the brain sometimes can use all the reprogramming, (hey h-h-h-hold on dem enemas!) and the many techniques are useful.  However, what I am sure of, we all need Radical Sanity....a deep reminder of the journey that we have been on, the awesome surprise of our own existence traveling to this moment after 13.7 years out of the fireball, each and everyone of us, Borg included.....this amazing journey of spirit manifesting as these luminous awesome bodies.... I think more than anything else, this is the time to stand for each and every One of our miraculous appearances, to remind ourselves that we are 'outcropping in the mind of God', not theoretically, or metaphorically, but deeply, absolutely as our deepest reality.... and then, it is time to begin to celebrate this wondrous thing.  O holy night! and o holy day! and o holy cow!
lots of love to all of you
Jane

[Jane]

ah and T.S. too!
 
With the drawing of this Love and the voice of this
     Calling

We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.
Through the unknown, unremembered gate
When the last of earth left to discover
Is that which was the beginning;
At the source of the longest river
The voice of the hidden waterfall
And the children in the apple-tree
Not known, because not looked for
But heard, half-heard, in the stillness
Between two waves of the sea.
Quick now, here, now, always—
A condition of complete simplicity
(Costing not less than everything)
And all shall be well and
All manner of thing shall be well
When the tongues of flame are in-folded
Into the crowned knot of fire
And the fire and the rose are one.